I started this year with a mad plan, a plan to push myself physically further than I’ve ever done before, even more than back in 2010. I wanted to raise as much money as I could for four great and worthy charities. A noble thing to I’m sure you’ll agree?
Fast forward to now. I’m 20 running miles and over 90 cycling miles down on where I should be to meet all parts of the challenge.
I know if I push it I can get these extra miles pegged and finish the year ticking all the boxes for my challenge. The question is, is it worth it?
Hardly anyone has sponsored me even though I’ve covered over 3,500 miles walking, running and cycling in the last 309 days. And I know I had this conversation with Shelli a couple of months back when I had a bit of a blip, about it not being all about the sponsorship money, about it being a personal challenge for me, and that that was the most important part of this whole thing, but I would be telling a lie if I said the sponsorship money didn’t matter to me.
I think the time has come for me to seriously look at what I’m doing because it’s beginning to affect my life a great deal more than I fully appreciated it would, or could, at the beginning of the year. I’m stressed about being down on my miles. Every day I’m not able to squeeze a run in or get on the exercise bike I feel like a failure, lazy, a waste of space.
I’ve begun to push away from all that’s great in my life because I must go for a run; I must get some miles done on the exercise bike.
Is it time to quit before I lose something far more important? But here’s the crux: will I be able to look at myself again if I quite now?
I don’t know…
A challenge too Far?
It’s become all-consuming.
Has it been worth it?